


Claiming you are more punkrock than the very rare bisexual punkrock dragon with ability to temporary die might have an unexpected effect on your bedsheets preference.

by KayleighMcCamyo



Series: Groupchats of One Direction and 5 Seconds of Summer [10]
Category: 5 Seconds of Summer (Band), One Direction
Genre: Calum is so done, Crack, Daddy Kink, Gangbang, Humor, I Don't Even Know, I am so sorry, Lashton - Freeform, M/M, Multi, Sarcasm, Top!Luke, Trash Talk, Why Did I Write This?, bottom!Louis, bottom!Zayn, crackfic, evil bottoms, groupchats, im leaving, larry - Freeform, louis is so rude, top!ashton, zayn is so horny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-10
Updated: 2015-08-10
Packaged: 2018-04-14 00:31:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4543311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KayleighMcCamyo/pseuds/KayleighMcCamyo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis: seriously punkrock?!</p><p>Harry: oh dear god, love do you have to</p><p>Louis: seriously?!?! PUNK ROCK?!?!</p><p>Louis: The only punkrock thing about Hemmings‘ band is Clifford‘s dick</p><p>Mikey: I-</p><p>Luke: tomlinson what the fcuk</p><p>Ash: oh dear god</p><p>Harry: there we go</p><p>Zayn: and they say I am the rude one</p>
            </blockquote>





	Claiming you are more punkrock than the very rare bisexual punkrock dragon with ability to temporary die might have an unexpected effect on your bedsheets preference.

**Author's Note:**

> I just. I... uh.

Groupsex

Michael the Cliffaconda (Mikey) has started a groupchat. He’s invited: Luke, Ash, Cal, Liam, Louis, Harry, Zayn and Niall.

 

 **Mikey** : guys i have a problem.

 **Cal** : i s2g michael if it's about your dick again

 **Liam** : why am i even here

 **Luke** : Hiiii, mikey^^

 **Mikey** : hiii, lukey-penguin^^

 **Niall** : awwww, my babies, ily.

 **Liam** : …okay, that was… surprisingly… cute.

 **Ash** : hiii, mikey^^

 **Mikey** : fuck off irwin

 **Niall** : ouch.

 **Liam** : uh-oh.

 **Cal** : shut up y’all, i wanna catch up on some sleep.

 **Mikey** : you tell me, really

 **Niall** : what's going on in our fave punk-rock band?

 **Louis** : pfffffff are you serious

 **Louis** : punkrock band ????

 **Mikey** : the fuck tomlinson

 **Luke** : continue tomlinson i fucking dare you

 **Mikey** : tomlinson i am punkrock u understand that

 **Ash** : louis please don't go there

 **Niall** : louis if you offend mikeys punkrock, and if you die, im not gonna sue him, because you‘d deserved it.

 **Ash** : seriously louis Cal is a baby and whatever, but don't argue with Mikey about punkrock

 **Ash** : you end up violently murdered, and it's gonna be your fault.

 **Louis** : seriously punkrock?!

 **Harry** : oh dear god, love do you have to

 **Louis** : seriously?!?! PUNK ROCK?!?!

 **Louis** : The only punkrock thing about Hemmings‘ band is Clifford‘s dick

 **Mikey** : I-

 **Luke** : tomlinson what the fcuk

 **Ash** : oh dear god

 **Harry** : there we go

 **Zayn** : and they say I am the rude one

 **Mikey** : Literally I…

 **Luke** : TOMLINSNO N whA THE FUCKGNS FUCK ARE YOU KIDDING ME WHAT THE FUCK

 **Niall** : oh, bother

 **Liam** : wow louis you pissed off the baby penguin congrats

 **Luke** : THE FUCK ING FCUK I AM FUCKING LEAVING I HATE YALL

 **Louis** : haha, baby penguin is mad at me?

 **Mikey** : louis literally… thank you?

 **Luke** : THIS IS NOT WHAT I SIGNED FOR

 **Zayn** : wow seriously louis what a compliment

 **Luke** : YALL RUDE AND THIS ISN OT A NICE THING TO BE DO YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO RUDE PEOPLE

 **Liam** : it's actually… this conversation is surprisigly very sweet.

 **Niall** : well somebody pissed my fav penguin off so no not really

 **Luke** : TOMLISNON YOU FUCKIGN TAKE THIS BACK

 **Mikey** : i am… i am blushing?

 **Louis** : that's because you are my fav very rare bisexual punkrock dragon with the ability to temporary die.

 **Luke** : ILL FUCKIGN FIGHT YOU R ASS WITH MYDIC K

 **Liam** : no oh ym gof please no this was such a pleasant conversation till now

 **Luke** : CALUM THE FUCK SAY SOMTHING HE OFFENDED YOUR BAND

 **Liam** : please no dicks and bums please at least once

 **Cal** : don't bring me into business tomlinson is in i don't want to have anything in common with the evil sub

 **Louis** : ehehe

 **Niall** :  im getting my camera.

 **Luke** : I SHOW YOU HOW PUNKROCK I AM MY DICK WILL TEACH YOU A LESSON

 **Liam** : oh no please no not again no why  idont understand why this keeps happening to me

 **Louis** : Sure love, what about you come up here and prove yourself, baby-penguin?

 **Zayn** : Louis and Luke, huh?

 **Luke** : TMLSNON FUCKT YOU IMA MANLY AND I'm DANGEROUS MY PUNKROCK IS AS HEAVY AS MICHAELS AVE YOU SEEN MY LIP RING I AM UPNKROCK

 **Ash** : Harry would you mind to calm your husband down or should i go grab some popcorn and niall and stop by your room

 **Louis** : you are the cutest potato, lukey-pumpkin ^.^

 **Liam** : no please no h my god no

 **Harry** : im getting handcuffs, could you bring lube? We ran off…

 **Zayn** : Niall?

 **Luke** : FUCK YOU TOMLINSON IMA SHOW MY 8 INCHES DOWN YOUR THROAT AMD MAKE YOU COKE ON TI

 **Liam** : no please no dick in mouths please don't DON'T LUKEY YOU AR  EA BABY YOU CAN'T SAY THINGS LIKE THIS

 **Ash** : okay, it went from cutesy to hot within seconds

 **Louis** : hmmm, you know all the things i love to hear.

 **Zayn** : Niall where are you?

 **Ash** : im standing infront of your door, can i come in?

 **Cal** : can someone take the crazy little evil sub thing away from me luke is drooling in my room

 **Louis** : yes, ash, please daddy

 **Harry** : niall is here, setting the camera.

 

**Ash has left the conversation.**

**Harry** : And louis is getting naked so lukey, if you want to fuck him senseless, you should hurry, otherwise it's gonna be ashton’s and mine dick he's gonna choke on.

 **Zayn** : oh god ash is in there too? can i join you guys?

 

 **Luke** **has left the conversation.**

**Liam** : oh my fucking god

 **Cal** : you seriously wanna bang

 **Zayn** : can i fuck Ash? I would probably even let him top me.

 **Liam** : what

 **Louis** : oh fuck get the fuck here i wanna fuck the life out of you –ash

 **Cal** : literally what i am leavign this band

 **Mikey** : good, noone likes you anyway.

 **Harry** : mikey you won't join in?

 **Cal** : oh please no i don't have nerves for this

 **Mikey** : nah, tired. And niall‘s making a sextape so ill watch it later in private *wink wink*

 

**Louis has left the conversation.**

**Zayn:** okay Harry can i come in?

 **Cal** : ashton what the fuck literally 20 days ago you had no idea you are into guys and now you are fucking the scariest bottom on this planet?!?!

 **Harry** : aww, feeling horny, zee? Come in, im getting naked and Louis is actually choking on Luke’s… well, lets say it is 8 inches…

 **Zayn** : ill show him how 8 inches looks like.

 **Niall** : catch ya later guys, i have work to do now.

 

**Niall has left the conversation.**

**Cal** : oh my fucking god they‘re serious.

 

**Zayn has left the conversation.**

**Liam** : why. Why does this always happen to me.

 **Cal** : i don't understand why are they serious this was just a joke

 

**Harry has left the conversation.**

**Mikey** : guys? Guys, i had a question that's why i started this groupchat

 **Cal** : Michael no

 **Liam** : Michael no

 **Mikey** : Michael yes.

 

**Liam has left the conversation.**

**Mikey** : I have a date tonight and I just wanted to know if i should shave a heart at the base of my dick? Would it look romantic?

 **Cal** : i quit.

 

**Cal has left the conversation.**

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading this stupidity.  
> If you wanna talk about louis tomlinson or mikeys punkrock, my tumblr is punk-cocks. I love yall.


End file.
